The Best There Ever Was

I was taken up to the farm to meet him on one of my early inspection trips. Inspection meaning, was I suitable husband material. It was clear that he was a big man in my prospective bride’s life, and his opinion meant the world to her.

It was cold, ass freezing cold, but the old man who was about 80 those 22 years ago, insisted on showing me the acreage. We tromped across pastures where the pooled water skimmed with ice. He pointed out the water so I wouldn’t get my city cowboy boots wet, but he walked right though. I looked to see what kind of rubber boots he was wearing and all I saw was sock feet. He was so excited to show me the place that he completely forgot about shoes. That water never slowed him up, not one bit.

That is what my folk would call tough. Tough as a pine knot.

One hundred one years and 11 months, he lived in that Tennessee mountain hollow. He was one of a kind. Never lacking in self confidence, and never offensive in his self assuredness, he possessed the most unique quality I ever saw in a man. He was proud of everything that he did, that his family did, but it was never at anyone else’s expense. Besides it ain’t bragging if you can back it up.

He hard scrabble farmed, worked as part of the CCC building highway 441 across Newfound Gap, worked as a timber cutter, made his share of corn liquor, acted as barber for his friends, and worked for a time at the Alcoa aluminum plant. But those were just things to put food on the table, what he did best was raise family. What he did best was unconditional love. What he did best was show the way on how a man should conduct himself in life.

He lived as he wanted, and he died according to his wishes. He was razor sharp mentally until his last breath. His last interchange was “what time is it?”. He wanted to know, so he could tell the story accurately to his maker on the details of him traveling home. Like his maker wouldn’t know.

He was my hero. A man who was not afraid of tackling anything. A man who was comfortable with who he was. His friends spanned the spectrum from self made millionaires to plain living country folk. He treated them all the same. I think it was easy for him, cause he wanted nor needed nothing they had. What a simple but powerful concept, for it made his friendship so genuine. The current generation has an expression of “keeping it real”, yeh, that was him, he kept it real.

Did he finally accept me? I think so. He watched me fix a lawn mower engine one day. We were one and the same from that day on. I only hope that I lived up to the expectations he had for his only granddaughter. He knew she was a treasure, and I hope he entrusted the treasure with me.

Harley Balford Duggan, we shall miss you. But you will always be such a part of who we are. When you described things you were proud of, you proclaimed them “the best that ever was”.

You sir, were the best that ever was.